How
many times have you heard this saying, “When Life Hands You Lemons, Make
Lemonade?” How often do you actually apply it to your life? If you have applied
it, was your lemonade bitter or sweet? Yes, I have so many questions. Questions
about life. See, here’s the thing, I love me some sweet lemonade. You know the
fresh squeezed kind they sell at Auntie Anne’s Pretzel Shop… Mmmmm.
I don’t like much of anything that
is bitter: fruits, candy, pastries, or people. Yes, the last word in the
previous sentence is people. People. People. People. Some people choose to be
bitter. Let’s pause for a moment to research the definition of bitter.
bitter
(adjective): having a strong and often unpleasant flavor, opposite of sweet,
causing painful emotions, angry, unhappy because of unfair treatment.
The above definitions were found in
the Webster’s dictionary. There were several definitions, but I’ve chosen to
just stop at this one. It’s short and compacted with a lot of information.
First, it states that bitter is having
a strong and often unpleasant flavor. Who wants to eat something that’s
describe in this way? It doesn’t just have an unpleasant flavor, but the flavor
is strong, like a lemon or lime. Some of us enjoy eating lemons and limes. Do
we enjoy the company of a bitter person? A person that always (never failing)
has something negative to say. They’re always complaining. They’re always upset
about something. Their car was scratched by somebody’s door, then a bird pooped
on their window shield. Blah Blah Blah. Okay, maybe you don’t mind being around
this type of person or maybe it’s you. Your nagging bestfriend (or maybe it’s
you) is (are) a dark storm cloud clouding someone’s thoughts. You’re usually
not happy with your decisions in life and you want everyone to know and be
unhappy with you.
Secondly, it states that bitter is
the opposite of sweet. This type of person is just not nice to anyone. They’re
mean, nasty, cruel, and they’re okay with the way they are. The most disturbing
thing about this person’s personality is he/she doesn’t believe they hurt
others with their bitterness.
Then there’s the definition of
anger. Bitter = Anger. I’ve dealt with anger very often in my life. In my work
place, my students maybe angry. While at home, Christian (my son) may get
angry. And (I am aware I shouldn’t start a sentence with a conjunction) there’s
me. . . I get angry! I get angry in traffic. I get angry at my son’s father (a
lot!). I even get angry at God. Yes, I said it! I was extremely angry when I
got pregnant. Surprise!! Many people saw me and thought I was the happiest
pregnant woman they’ve ever meet. Many people see my son and say, “You must
have been really happy while pregnant with him.” Well, maybe I was happy more
than angry during my pregnancy, but I had a lot to be angry and happy about.
For one, my students at work kept me extremely happy. The work place was my
escape place. Believe it or not. I knew his (Christian’s) father couldn’t
bother me there. My thoughts of him were gone once I entered that place. My
mind and heart were focused on my students. I was often angry when my thoughts
had time to wander. Mostly, while at home alone, or driving home. I had time to
get angry. I had time to make him angry also. I also had time to cause him
pain. . . which I only did because he hurt me. Yes, those were the thoughts
going through my heart and mind.
That brings me to the last
definition, bitter is being unhappy because of unfair treatment. I felt that
God had dealt me an unfair life. Not in regards to getting pregnant, but by getting
pregnant by a particular person. Yes, I know I had to have sex to get pregnant.
But . . . “Why him?” or “Why Me, God?”
(A later blog post title.) I had a lot of “Why” questions for God. Has He
answered them all??? Mmmmm I would say, “no”. Although, He hasn’t answered
them, but He is slowly showing me my answers. I’m dealing with the lemons in my
life. I’m coping with the bitterness in life. Am I accepting bitterness to take
control over me? No. I am learning how to control my bitterness/anger. I am
learning how to make some sweet lemonade out of sour lemons.
Simple
things I do to stay under control:
1. Think
positive. Think positive. Think positive.
2. Ask
for help. If it’s extreme, I have to pray. I have to vent to God.
3. Vent
to someone nice, someone I can trust.
4. Try
my best to let it go and control my thinking.